The Real & the Ideal : Joys & Challenges of Starting an MCG
by: Joshua Wilson, WCI Leader Couple, Lafayette, LA
During our engagement and marriage-prep process, Lilly and I talked intently about wanting to join a program like Domestic Church after we received our sacrament. Our main desire with this was to grow closer together while simultaneously building intentional community for both support and accountability. Within the first year of marriage, we encountered the WCI through the Muller family here in Lafayette, LA. The more we spoke to Sam and Leah about the WCI and their own MCG, the more drawn we were to this organization and Married Couple Groups in our individual prayer and subsequent conversations as a couple. We joined the first leadership couple training we could, encountered St. John Paul II’s Rule for married life, and were mesmerized (if that is the correct word) by this great Saint’s lived experience with couples like us, as well as his coined term, “Conjugal Spirituality”. We knew this was the way of life for us!
While some leader couples’ first big hurdle is actually finding members for their new married couples group, we didn’t seem to have any trouble there. We prayed for a few weeks and then extended an invitation to the four couples that came to mind; two couples made the commitment and two did not. The next step was where our group was tested off-the-bat. We checked work/vacation/family schedules and set a date for a first meeting. When our initial meeting date finally arrived, Lilly and I had a clean house, snacks and wine at the ready, and were excited and prepared to get things kicked off the right foot! A few hours before everyone was supposed to arrive, one of the couples texted in the group chat about a leaking water pipe in their utility room caused by a nail from a recent roof repair. They were stressed about insurance deductibles, scheduling mitigation repairs, receiving compensation from the responsible party, etc., and almost backed out of the first meeting. Thankfully, we still met that evening despite Satan’s first obvious attempt to derail us – facing this adversity as a group from day one set a clear tone for what our mutual desires and commitments were for our group.
In subsequent months, I’ve been hospitalized for pneumonia and bronchitis, one couple had a week and a half long roller coaster leading to the delivery of their first beautiful child, the other couple had their second child followed by a week of multiple trips to and from the hospital for complications following delivery, holiday madness with many of us traveling out of town, college finals and graduation, and much more. Despite all of this, our group has done whatever we can to support one another, to pray for and with one another, and to stay on track with pursuing the ideal of weekly meetings while dealing with the very real circumstances that life has thrown in our way.
This shared purpose and commitment from each couple within our MCG has bore obvious, tremendous fruit within each of our marriages. Lilly and I have enjoyed the laughs, intimate conversations, openness, and depth offered by the WCI through our regular meetings. We have grown closer together as a couple through the small things that JP II offers us through his Rule; namely taking stock of our weeks by truly evaluating what our shared highs, lows, and God moments are for our marriage while also learning more about one another through the conjugal spirituality challenges. We feel closer together than we thought possible only 2 years ago and are witnessing many of these great things happening for the other two couples in our group as well. This Rule, this MCG, this commitment to growing closer together and strengthening marriages through purposeful community – with God at the center – has been nothing short of challenging/difficult in many moments; but even more so, it has been truly ordained in our lives and is something we hope to live out for many years to come!
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